In less than 24hrs I will be 29! Gulp! I had a mini panic attack about that! Idk why it's bothering me to turn 29, but it's is; I keep think that if I say 29 enough that when I turn 29, 29 won't bother me anymore....yep 29 still bothers me!
I have one year left in my fabulous 20's then its time I get old.....AARP, senior citizen discounts etc. ok maybe not that bad but still it feels like it.
Will update you tomorrow after the county fair and after I turn 29, I say that like I am expected to turn into a toad or something. I hope not!
Thursday, April 5, 2012
Tuesday, March 27, 2012
One year left
In two weeks I will be 29! ( gasping loudly inserted here) Yes I have one year left in my 20's and just thinking about turning 30 give me panic attacks!
I always get really excited for my birthday and every year I get let down. On what exactly you may ask, the thing is idk! Idk why I feel let down!
I want to make the most of my 20's so I am going to spend the next 365 days doing all the crap I always wanted to do before I turn 30.
So um.....give me ideas!!
I always get really excited for my birthday and every year I get let down. On what exactly you may ask, the thing is idk! Idk why I feel let down!
I want to make the most of my 20's so I am going to spend the next 365 days doing all the crap I always wanted to do before I turn 30.
So um.....give me ideas!!
Tuesday, January 17, 2012
Courage
Such a small word, such a HUGE meaning. We all want to have courage, whether is in a day to day aspect of our lives, to face the bully at school and show her no fear, to do the unthinkable because its what you need to do, to follow your dreams, to speak your mimd, to stand up for something you believe it. If you dont stand for something you will fall for anything....courage....is what it takes to stand up.
Courage is what it takes to see a path you want and go towards it. Faith is what it takes to get us there. You cant have one with out the other. The drive to do that one thing you always wanted to do, its faith that keeps you there, keeps you strong and steady.
The first step....is always the longest stride. Faith is knowing that that second step will be there, that there will ways be a light at the end of the tunnel, that every cloud has a sliver lining and faith is always beliving that everythign happens for a reason.
We often come to a bridge with two paths but we can only take one. Which one do we choose, which one is right for us, which one do we honestly deep down in the gut know we should take.... Courage is what it takes to pick that bridge for ourselfs...Faith is what keeps us there, on our path (assuming its not illegal activity)and steadfast in our fight.
Most often the answer to our problems is on our knees. Faith...is what we have and God is what gives it to us.
2012 a year of choices based on our goals and Faith in God to see us through
Courage is what it takes to see a path you want and go towards it. Faith is what it takes to get us there. You cant have one with out the other. The drive to do that one thing you always wanted to do, its faith that keeps you there, keeps you strong and steady.
The first step....is always the longest stride. Faith is knowing that that second step will be there, that there will ways be a light at the end of the tunnel, that every cloud has a sliver lining and faith is always beliving that everythign happens for a reason.
We often come to a bridge with two paths but we can only take one. Which one do we choose, which one is right for us, which one do we honestly deep down in the gut know we should take.... Courage is what it takes to pick that bridge for ourselfs...Faith is what keeps us there, on our path (assuming its not illegal activity)and steadfast in our fight.
Most often the answer to our problems is on our knees. Faith...is what we have and God is what gives it to us.
2012 a year of choices based on our goals and Faith in God to see us through
Saturday, December 31, 2011
New Years, Resolutions, Fireworks, Drinking and Celebrating!
The title pretty much sums up new years right?
Well like every new years we vow to make resolutions stick or not to make them, to better our selfs. We want to loose weight, quit smoking, quit drinking, quit drugs, do better and school and/or work, find the right man, have more kids, make more money, save more money or heck....just to be an all round better person.
Last year I vowed to not make any and just try to do my best. Well that didnt exactly work.... AT ALL.... but it was the same even if I did make resolutions.
So this year....I am going to make Afirmations.... Things I want to change, get or do.
1) Loose Weight
2) Find a Church I like and go, ya know like more than once in a blue moon.
3) Buy a Volvo C30 in RED...no more than 2 yrs old....and by October.
4) PAY OFF SOME BILLS!! LOL
Thats it! 4! Easy right?!?! NOT
This year I am seriously going to put some effort into
Well like every new years we vow to make resolutions stick or not to make them, to better our selfs. We want to loose weight, quit smoking, quit drinking, quit drugs, do better and school and/or work, find the right man, have more kids, make more money, save more money or heck....just to be an all round better person.
Last year I vowed to not make any and just try to do my best. Well that didnt exactly work.... AT ALL.... but it was the same even if I did make resolutions.
So this year....I am going to make Afirmations.... Things I want to change, get or do.
1) Loose Weight
2) Find a Church I like and go, ya know like more than once in a blue moon.
3) Buy a Volvo C30 in RED...no more than 2 yrs old....and by October.
4) PAY OFF SOME BILLS!! LOL
Thats it! 4! Easy right?!?! NOT
This year I am seriously going to put some effort into
Monday, December 26, 2011
The End
The End.
An ending of a story, fairy tale, mystery, horror or sifi book, play or movie. Generally THE END leaves the audience with a sence of ending, all the loose ends are tied up...everyone is happily ever after and you walk away knowing that its all right in that world.
In our world....Reality. The End is not always so neat and tied up with a bow. Its hard, ugly and sometimes wonderful and beautiful. Mostly when we speak of The End its not so wonderful. Death, breakups, divorce, broken hearts are just a few things that come with The End.
The End...just because soemthing has ended does not mean it ended. We loose a loved one...its the end of there life but just the beganing of our pain and loss. Sometimes its not so easy to know when to end things. End a friendship, relationship, job or fight...how do we know when we throw our hands up and walk away. Espically depending on how much time, effort and heart is involved in it.
An ending of a story, fairy tale, mystery, horror or sifi book, play or movie. Generally THE END leaves the audience with a sence of ending, all the loose ends are tied up...everyone is happily ever after and you walk away knowing that its all right in that world.
In our world....Reality. The End is not always so neat and tied up with a bow. Its hard, ugly and sometimes wonderful and beautiful. Mostly when we speak of The End its not so wonderful. Death, breakups, divorce, broken hearts are just a few things that come with The End.
The End...just because soemthing has ended does not mean it ended. We loose a loved one...its the end of there life but just the beganing of our pain and loss. Sometimes its not so easy to know when to end things. End a friendship, relationship, job or fight...how do we know when we throw our hands up and walk away. Espically depending on how much time, effort and heart is involved in it.
Saturday, November 19, 2011
Dec 14-25 1944
14th
Walked with Snuffy to the ater carried the .32 A.F. revolver. Saw a hawk. Jumped a rabbit after almost stepping on him, no one fired.
19th
Went with Daddy to Timber Creek. Dad killed a squarel (wonded him) and while still in tree. I shot him in the head with M-63 22 Auto . Also hit and wounded an owl with the .22. This afternoon we went to hunt arrow heads up Sabine on other side of highway. The place is no good.
20th
Got 2 boxes of Reington Hi Speed .22 shells.
21st
Today I went to no.4 pool duck hunting. But after this year, sky won leader and a cold north wind blowing plenty of ducks and them flying too, but never in close enough. about to freeze to death. I foudn a boy with a fire and sat down by him and got warm. Jimmy Howard made some ducks fly with is .22. Wind was very cold and so strong it almost impossible to stay in it. A blizzard in the north is coming and the ducks are coming ahdead of it.
22nd
Fired on shot with .12 gague auto at 2 flying crows; no hit. I drove the car with hin 100 yards of them, got out, and shot at the two, when i fired, the other one left in the wrong direction. There were no ducks.
24th
Took airplaine ride, very foggy and rainey
25th
Warm, temp about 50, but foggy and rainey. Daddy and I drove down the terrell highway and i carried the m-63 auto. and shot at hawks. Mostly too far away,except one which flew just as the gun fired.
Ate christmas dinner at grandmotherss and sat aroudn rest of day.
Walked with Snuffy to the ater carried the .32 A.F. revolver. Saw a hawk. Jumped a rabbit after almost stepping on him, no one fired.
19th
Went with Daddy to Timber Creek. Dad killed a squarel (wonded him) and while still in tree. I shot him in the head with M-63 22 Auto . Also hit and wounded an owl with the .22. This afternoon we went to hunt arrow heads up Sabine on other side of highway. The place is no good.
20th
Got 2 boxes of Reington Hi Speed .22 shells.
21st
Today I went to no.4 pool duck hunting. But after this year, sky won leader and a cold north wind blowing plenty of ducks and them flying too, but never in close enough. about to freeze to death. I foudn a boy with a fire and sat down by him and got warm. Jimmy Howard made some ducks fly with is .22. Wind was very cold and so strong it almost impossible to stay in it. A blizzard in the north is coming and the ducks are coming ahdead of it.
22nd
Fired on shot with .12 gague auto at 2 flying crows; no hit. I drove the car with hin 100 yards of them, got out, and shot at the two, when i fired, the other one left in the wrong direction. There were no ducks.
24th
Took airplaine ride, very foggy and rainey
25th
Warm, temp about 50, but foggy and rainey. Daddy and I drove down the terrell highway and i carried the m-63 auto. and shot at hawks. Mostly too far away,except one which flew just as the gun fired.
Ate christmas dinner at grandmotherss and sat aroudn rest of day.
Grandaddy
My grandfather passed away today. He was diagnosed with terminal stage 4 thoat cancer in April, was only given two weeks. I saw most of his life Grandaddy beat the odds on just about everything. He was suffering and while we all know it was for the best it and hes with God now...it still is painful.
Recently I have been reading my grandfather diaries from 1944, he was appox 17-18 years old and most of the stuff is mundane but some really gives an insite into his life, thoughts or feelings.
Everyday (or almost every day) I am going to post some inserts from his diary until the last one in 1947. Seems fitting, he wrote these to leave a record and now someone gets to read that record. People never truely die...for they live on in our hearts, memories and history. As long as you remeber them....they are always here.
Recently I have been reading my grandfather diaries from 1944, he was appox 17-18 years old and most of the stuff is mundane but some really gives an insite into his life, thoughts or feelings.
Everyday (or almost every day) I am going to post some inserts from his diary until the last one in 1947. Seems fitting, he wrote these to leave a record and now someone gets to read that record. People never truely die...for they live on in our hearts, memories and history. As long as you remeber them....they are always here.
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
Mustard seed?! Yep totally done!
So as you can guess by my title that things were totally led by God. As the day went on, and the object of our worry became closer the calmer I got. It was the best experience I have had! Totaly easy, and the things turned out much better than originally thought! Well thats God for you, giving you what he has planned is always better than we can possibly think.
So having the faith of a mustard seed is harder in theory, but with God...its easy. I will say though that putting your full faith in him and walking out on it does get easier as the seconds get closer to it. Ever herd of Blind Faith...yep thats what it is when you meet it.
Thank you Lord,
You simply amaze us with your love, faith and plans you have for us. You continue to take care of us, and provide for us even though we sin against you daily and we dont deserve it. Thank you Lord for my blog followers, and continue to bless them and there lives. Be with my family and friends Lord and comfort those who hurt, worry or upset. For give us for our sins and trespasses.
In your heavenly name...Amen
Thanks for reading my blog, though at time it may not make any sense!
Mustard Seed
So having the faith of a mustard seed is harder in theory, but with God...its easy. I will say though that putting your full faith in him and walking out on it does get easier as the seconds get closer to it. Ever herd of Blind Faith...yep thats what it is when you meet it.
Thank you Lord,
You simply amaze us with your love, faith and plans you have for us. You continue to take care of us, and provide for us even though we sin against you daily and we dont deserve it. Thank you Lord for my blog followers, and continue to bless them and there lives. Be with my family and friends Lord and comfort those who hurt, worry or upset. For give us for our sins and trespasses.
In your heavenly name...Amen
Thanks for reading my blog, though at time it may not make any sense!
Mustard Seed
Faith of a Mustard Seed
Today I am having faith of a Mustard Seed, which you know is harder to do than it is to say. I always know God will take care and provide for us, but I am headstrong and think i need to be incontrol of the problem AND I am impatient! LOL What a confession! Write it down and print it out, I dont usually confess that info.
The hub's car has broken down AGAIN...we just spent 1,400 last month on a new transmission, put a tenture pully into it, countless sets of tires, tire rod ends, drive trains and an odomoter cluster (1,500 part!!!) and its only a 2004 with only 128K miles on it! I am begining to realize why they discontinued this model of cars. Well its gonna cost 1,100 plus tax to fix this car, and thats the cheapest quote, so I decided to lets look at trading it in. I called the leinholder and got our pay off, prayed that if this is what God has for us that all the pieces would fall into place that we wouldnt do this unless it was his will. So I am trying to have faith of a mustard seed and put this problem out of my mind, Gods got it and He WILL provide and take care of it. Its just letting the control freak in me to settle down, and shut up. LOL Harder than you think!! I am having to be patient, and let God take control.
God,
Its me again, Carolyn...Dont forget me down here. But I NEED you now, I know i need you always but I need you to open a window on what seems like a closed door. I only want to do your will for our lives, I know you will provide a way and will take care of us. Help me silence the control freak in me to hear your will and path for our lives.
I love you and in your heavenly name
Amen
Later
A child of God having faith of a mustand seed
The hub's car has broken down AGAIN...we just spent 1,400 last month on a new transmission, put a tenture pully into it, countless sets of tires, tire rod ends, drive trains and an odomoter cluster (1,500 part!!!) and its only a 2004 with only 128K miles on it! I am begining to realize why they discontinued this model of cars. Well its gonna cost 1,100 plus tax to fix this car, and thats the cheapest quote, so I decided to lets look at trading it in. I called the leinholder and got our pay off, prayed that if this is what God has for us that all the pieces would fall into place that we wouldnt do this unless it was his will. So I am trying to have faith of a mustard seed and put this problem out of my mind, Gods got it and He WILL provide and take care of it. Its just letting the control freak in me to settle down, and shut up. LOL Harder than you think!! I am having to be patient, and let God take control.
God,
Its me again, Carolyn...Dont forget me down here. But I NEED you now, I know i need you always but I need you to open a window on what seems like a closed door. I only want to do your will for our lives, I know you will provide a way and will take care of us. Help me silence the control freak in me to hear your will and path for our lives.
I love you and in your heavenly name
Amen
Later
A child of God having faith of a mustand seed
Thursday, June 30, 2011
My Journey to Find a Better Mood
I set out on a journey yesterday to achive a better mood. With the help of my wonderful loving incredible husband, I did find it. He cooked dinner, drew me a bubble bath, brung me a fresh brownie out of the oven while in my bath...and I soaked for two hours reading my new fav book (True Blue, David Baldacci). Then I got some kid free time with one of my besties Sissy, wasnt long but enough to catch up on our days and to bring a smile to my face.
Then this morning I awoke with a newly found sence of calm and peace, that is from my heavenly Father. I prayed and gave all my trouble and worries to him, and in exchange I got peace knowing that He is in control and He will take care of me. Isnt it great that we have a God who is willing to bear all for us, to take everything bad and wipe our sins away?
I found my better mood in a place I always knew it would be in the arm of my heavenly Father and the man he made espically for me.
Then this morning I awoke with a newly found sence of calm and peace, that is from my heavenly Father. I prayed and gave all my trouble and worries to him, and in exchange I got peace knowing that He is in control and He will take care of me. Isnt it great that we have a God who is willing to bear all for us, to take everything bad and wipe our sins away?
I found my better mood in a place I always knew it would be in the arm of my heavenly Father and the man he made espically for me.
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