Dealing with Difficult Coworkers

** I AM NOT saying I have the issues now but What I am saying is that I have dealt with this in the past. Apparently a coworker read this and either felt guilty (about something I didn't know about) or presumed it was about them. It was not. This has nothing to do with my current employer /coworkers. This deals with past jobs and employer's & coworkers**

How to deal with Difficult coworkers, a boss you don't like and mean girls in the office.

Yes as adults you would think we have evolved above High School dramatics and bullies but sadly enough we have not.

There are different dynamics, personalities and work ethics in every office, and for some of us its hard not to get feelings hurt in dealing with them all.

I am a God Fearing woman so my strength comes from the Lord, I spent a lot of time in prayer over my coworkers and asking for help, forgiveness. He has provided and some days the devil likes to come in and make me doubt it. I wear my heart on my sleeve and my feelings get hurt often.

A coworker once told me "People don't think of you as often as you think or at all"

Wow, that was the response I got to my question of "Hey did I do something to upset XXX as she seems mad at me"

Types of Coworkers you WILL have at work

 

 Grumpy / Everything is going wrong Coworker

    They are never happy, everything is wrong and nothing ever goes right

 

Know It All

I honestly think I fall into this category some in areas I know really well

    Title explains its self LOL

 

 Tattletale / Butt Kisser/ Boss's Favorite

     The one coworker who has the bosses ear, all their suggestions get herd and the boss likes them above all others. This type of person can also be the office martyr. Signs up for every bosses project, stays up late and gloats to the boss about all the hard work they did. This person is also most likely to be a socialite in the office but only for tattle tale reasons.  

 

Lazy Coworker

Gets paid well, works the least, steals ideas and is great at assigning work off to others

 

Control Freak / OCD/ Neat Freak

This person likes a clean desk, gripes when people leave messes in the lunch room and on a project they tend to take over. I will admit this is me. I like to be in charge and seen things done my way.

 

Hot Mess / Everybody's friend / Socialite

This guy is hard to hate, everyone likes him, he knows all the office gossip and hes the first to show compassion (even if its fake) or organize office parties. Hes also late every day, lazy and a little bit of the bosses pet. Hes kinda like the Quarter back in high school.



Now that we have identified with almost all types of personalites in an office setting lets see how to deal with them.

Way's to handle Coworkers

 

You cannot change them, but you can work better with them, first you need to look at your self and ask "Have I done anything or fallen into these categories my self?"

The answer is yes, yes you have. You will fall into one of these types of coworkes and to some you fall into many. If one employee is your bully, you could be the bully to someone else. So its always best to look at your self first.

 

Make Amends

I personally fall into this category. When a new employee was hired I was to train her, I was 6 months pregnant, throwing up every day and grouchy. I wasn't kind. I have spent the last 18 months trying to make it up to her. I will always be the bully to her, no matter how much I try not to be.

 

What's done is done

You cant change the past or how someone treated you. Ask the Lord for forgiveness, a softer heart to those who hurt you and protection against those who seek to hurt you.

 

Don't take it Personally

Ya right. that's harder than you think! Ask the Lord to give you a deaf ear to the meanness. There was once a employee at my kids school she was mean, a bully and likes to throw her weight around. While griping to a friend she said "Stop right there. She gets abused at home, verbally, mentally and sometimes I think physically. She has no power at home, but at work she does."

Not an excuse but it did help me understand that its not me. How I worked with her after that got much better. You never know the battles someone is facing!

 

Always be Kind

Don't let them walk all over you, but kill them with Kindness and Prayer. Treat them how you want to be treated, even when you want to throat punch them.  You will never change them, and you may never change the way they see you but you can change how you respond to them.

 

Don't Lose your Cool/Temper and Ignore the bad

Once a bully stops getting the response they expect they move on. So don't lose you cool or your temper. If you do it will never go well for you. Instead ignore the bad comments and only respond to the others.

 

Email/Text/Conversations

Always treat every email, text or conversations with coworkers as if its a group meeting/email. Because lets face it at some point it may be. Some people do not evolve above high school so while they may be your friend now, given the opportunity to fix their situation or move up in the company they will share what you said. Grip to those out side your office and no connections to your office.

Once will I sent a very innocent email to a coworker, she shared it with others making fun of me. To this day I do not understand why BUT she found my signature in my email funny and decided to make fun of me. This particular coworker I expect it from, what I didn't expect was for everyone to laugh and make fun of me. Apparently I am "over professional" and that's bad. Or so they say

 

Prayer

All days need to begin and end with Prayer. The Lord wants you to rely on Him, he can handle this.

This is what I pray

Lord, I pay that my head not think any bad thoughts or over think the situation, I pray for my heart to be filled with Love and Joy, I pray that my hands are busy with work, I pray that my ears are deaf to things that are meant to hurt me, I pray that my eyes will only see good in people. I pray that my mouth only has good things to say. I pray that you heal what's been broken, and those who don't know you will find you. I also pray that your holy sprit will fill the walls of this office so that when the press of evil may find no entrance. I pray for my boss, my coworkers and the prosperity of the office.

Amen,

 

 

I hope that in some small way I have helped you today, and that things get better.